didnt talk
Oct. 1st, 2025 06:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
castastonei decided not to bother talking to c. if the opportunity really presents itself maybe i will change my mind, but i think its for the best not to open up to him. he wanted me on his roster, i gave him the ick or something, hes over it, its hurtful, but i have people in my life that want me and value me.
also im getting attention from someone else which helps. z. is really nice and into me. i had a really good time with him last night (not sexual, we hung out with some friends!) hes skinnier than i would usually go for but he has a cute face. we would have cute babies. maybe im just ovulating.
i have to stop attaching self worth to sexual validation but oh boy it feels good! i have this mentality that if i fuck enough guys ill suddenly feel sexy and good in my body. its ridiculous and it will never happen. but im just not ready to confront that yet. give me a year.
also im getting attention from someone else which helps. z. is really nice and into me. i had a really good time with him last night (not sexual, we hung out with some friends!) hes skinnier than i would usually go for but he has a cute face. we would have cute babies. maybe im just ovulating.
i have to stop attaching self worth to sexual validation but oh boy it feels good! i have this mentality that if i fuck enough guys ill suddenly feel sexy and good in my body. its ridiculous and it will never happen. but im just not ready to confront that yet. give me a year.
